Levels of conflicts

Topic time estimate: 5 Minutes

When the interests of two or more different parties are at odds you will experience conflict.

We differentiate 5 levels of conflict from low to high:

1. Discomfort
2. Incident
3. Misunderstanding
4. Tension
5. And Crisis

You find the conflict levels on page 5 of your workbook.

Catch conflicts before they escalate to crisis. The earlier a conflict is addressed the easier it is to resolve it. To address conflicts use the levels as a conflict resolution tool. The levels enable you to talk about the conflict on a Meta communication level. Meta communication means to talk about communication instead of purely communicating. Use the conflict levels to open a conflict resolution conversation.

Example

Your organisation has a shared company vehicle that is used for client visits. Pre-booking is required and the vehicle is not for private use, such as using the car for running personal errands or going to lunch. A new employee who started recently has started using the car as they please. There is a tension between you and the new employee.

Here are two ways the conversation could go:

• Clearly, the new employee doesn’t know how to behave. You started to notice constant misconduct in all their work. You decide to tell your employee that their behaviour is wrong (Win-lose mindset):
  “Hey about the car you are not allowed to use it as you please. It’s a company car and we all share it.”
• You realise that this conflict is escalating quickly as you are already feeling tension on other topics towards the employee. You decide to address the issue openly with a win-win mindset before things get worse. After all, you both can learn from this situation (win-win mindset):
  “Hey, how’s it going? Do you have a couple of minutes, maybe we can grab a seat in the meeting room? I have started to feel tense, as I think there has been a misunderstanding regarding the use of the company vehicle. Maybe I have not explained it to you clearly enough. The company policies are…”

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Optional

Time estimate: 12 Minutes

This topic has additional resources in the Materials tab to deepen your understanding of opportunities hidden in conflicts. At any point in time feel free to come back to this material.